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Carlos
Our only son Carlos is autistic. We started to notice little things that began to worry us shortly after his 1st birthday. One minute developmentally, Carlos sailed through then the next he complete shut down; just like a switch that had been turned off. Carlos had changed forever, the little boy that I knew, I knew no longer. He would line things up and stare into space, we would call his name and there would be nothing but empty words. One morning I waited by his bedroom door for him to call out to me as he once did on awakening, over an hour went past and there was nothing I peaked around the door to see what he was doing and he was just sitting there lost and not caring if I was there or not, That day broke my heart as I knew then and there that things were going down a different road that scared me. We took him to our family doctor with our concerns but were told that boys develop slower than girls and not to worry just yet, friends and other mothers I had gotten to know from mothers group said the same. But I knew in my heart that things weren’t right, I would watch other children interacting with their mothers and with other children and Carlos would be lost in his own world. Even going to the playground was heart breaking, watching other children even younger that Carlos playing and talking with their parents, my son wouldn’t even walk anywhere and finally I shrunk away from social engagements and family events even going shopping was impossible. Finally just before his 2nd birthday we decided to go to another doctor for a second opinion, as things were getting worse. As we walked into the room and sat down Carlos was running back and forth completely out of control moaning, we sat down and started to tell the doctor about our concerns and that so far we have been told not to worry, He turn to us and said that Carlos is showing signs of being autistic. I had heard of the word and felt even frightened by it but really didn’t know what it meant for our son and for his future. As we walked out into the street tears fell uncontrollably from our eyes feeling like someone had just taken our son away, like a death.
From that moment on we all live and breath an autistic life some of our friends couldn’t deal with what we were going through and one by one they never called again.
The
Internet was a great source of
information but overwhelming at times, books were terrific but
emotional, yet slowly we started to feel like we were getting somewhere
finally! We found a paediatrician that understood what these
children’s needs to help them with their gut and brain function.
That for us really made a big different in Carlos coping with everyday
life, we put him on a gluten free casein free diet and soon we stared
seeing glimpse of our son’s personality back. His eye contact
returned and soon he began to pay attention and thus he started
learning to play along side other children happily.We also came across a local centre called pathways early intervention centre, which gave wonderful support and information; there we meet other families going through the same thing as us. We started to learn about our son and how to help him, infact we stared to learn a new language. Slowly with support from occupational therapists, speech therapists and home support help we are stating to rebuild our lives. Carlos today doesn’t speak a world but is supported by visuals; we have visuals for everything from food choices to what we are doing today. Carlos needs structure in his life other wise he can’t cope with too much change if at all it all depends on the day. Carlos now does respond to his name and is very gifted in some things, but ask him to do a very simple task he struggles. Many times we have been stared at in public because our son would be having a melt down or refusing to walk home from pre-school so I would have to pick him up and carry him all the way home, crying from peoples stares. Every family with autism understands the struggles of every day, the contend thinking ahead of time trying to trouble shoot, every family with autism have to wear hundreds of hats and most do it alone. We all want the same thing for our children its no different for families with autistic kids, these familes have to work much harder for their children’s independence.
Carlos is
now 6
years old. Since 2008 Carlos has been fortunate enough
to attend Giant Steps School five days a week in the K-6 program. Giant
Steps is a special school that provides an intensive and integrated
approach in the treatment of children with autism. The support and
assistance Carlos has received has made a huge difference to his
progress and the quality of his life. Quality services for children
with autism are sadly lacking and Giant Steps is one of the few places
that provides the expert help that is required, including individual
educational programs, occupational, music and speech therapies combined
with instruction in daily living skills.