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Carlos
Our only
son
Carlos is autistic. We started to notice little things
that began to worry us shortly after his 1st birthday. One minute
developmentally, Carlos sailed through then the next he complete shut
down; just like a switch that had been turned off. Carlos had changed
forever, the little boy that I knew, I knew no longer. He would line
things up and stare into space, we would call his name and there would
be nothing but empty words. One morning I waited by his bedroom door
for him to call out to me as he once did on awakening, over an hour
went past and there was nothing I peaked around the door to see what he
was doing and he was just sitting there lost and not caring if I was
there or not, That day broke my heart as I knew then and there that
things were going down a different road that scared me. We took him to
our family doctor with our concerns but were told that boys develop
slower than girls and not to worry just yet, friends and other mothers
I had gotten to know from mothers group said the same. But I knew in my
heart that things weren’t right, I would watch other children
interacting with their mothers and with other children and Carlos would
be lost in his own world. Even going to the playground was heart
breaking, watching other children even younger that Carlos playing and
talking with their parents, my son wouldn’t even walk anywhere
and finally I shrunk away from social engagements and family events
even going shopping was impossible. Finally just before his 2nd
birthday we decided to go to another doctor for a second opinion, as
things were getting worse. As we walked into the room and sat down
Carlos was running back and forth completely out of control moaning, we
sat down and started to tell the doctor about our concerns and that so
far we have been told not to worry, He turn to us and said that Carlos
is showing signs of being autistic. I had heard of the word and felt
even frightened by it but really didn’t know what it meant for
our son and for his future. As we walked out into the street tears fell
uncontrollably from our eyes feeling like someone had just taken our
son away, like a death.
From that
moment
on we all live and breath an autistic life some of our
friends couldn’t deal with what we were going through and one by
one they never called again. The
Internet was a great source of
information but overwhelming at times, books were terrific but
emotional, yet slowly we started to feel like we were getting somewhere
finally! We found a paediatrician that understood what these
children’s needs to help them with their gut and brain function.
That for us really made a big different in Carlos coping with everyday
life, we put him on a gluten free casein free diet and soon we stared
seeing glimpse of our son’s personality back. His eye contact
returned and soon he began to pay attention and thus he started
learning to play along side other children happily.
We also
came
across a local centre called pathways early intervention
centre, which gave wonderful support and information; there we meet
other families going through the same thing as us. We started to learn
about our son and how to help him, infact we stared to learn a new
language. Slowly with support from occupational therapists, speech
therapists and home support help we are stating to rebuild our lives.
Carlos today doesn’t speak a world but is supported by visuals;
we have visuals for everything from food choices to what we are doing
today. Carlos needs structure in his life other wise he can’t
cope with too much change if at all it all depends on the day. Carlos
now does respond to his name and is very gifted in some things, but ask
him to do a very simple task he struggles. Many times we have been
stared at in public because our son would be having a melt down or
refusing to walk home from pre-school so I would have to pick him up
and carry him all the way home, crying from peoples stares. Every
family with autism understands the struggles of every day, the contend
thinking ahead of time trying to trouble shoot, every family with
autism have to wear hundreds of hats and most do it alone. We all want
the same thing for our children its no different for families with
autistic kids, these familes have to work much harder for their
children’s independence.
Carlos is
now 6
years old. Since 2008 Carlos has been fortunate enough
to attend Giant Steps School five days a week in the K-6 program. Giant
Steps is a special school that provides an intensive and integrated
approach in the treatment of children with autism. The support and
assistance Carlos has received has made a huge difference to his
progress and the quality of his life. Quality services for children
with autism are sadly lacking and Giant Steps is one of the few places
that provides the expert help that is required, including individual
educational programs, occupational, music and speech therapies combined
with instruction in daily living skills.
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